Bowl me over

So, the other day I was sitting outside my rig, staring at the mountains and I’d let my mind off its leash. The old gray mass was wandering around, listening to the wind, looking at cloud shapes, sniffing the fresh air—when all of a sudden it whirls around and rushes back to me with this question:

Why do we serve pancakes on a plate?

Then you spend the entire meal chasing down errant syrup with the pancake bits you’ve impaled on your fork. Even expending all that effort, there’re still puddles of pancake syrup scattered about the plate when all the pancakes are gone.

Now I’m sure you, like I, learned in high school physics that pancakes and waffles posses the requisite properties allowing them to soak up all but the most over-thickened, bland-tasting, maple syrup substitutes. And I’m sure you, like I, have carried out the experiments proving these properties, taking note of how the bottom-most pancake absorbs the sucrose or fructose suspensions (i.e., syrup) with which it may come in contact.

How best, I wondered, to take advantage of these properties?

Eureka! I thought, serve pancakes in a bowl!

Concentrate the syrup to the center. Then, when you cut down through a stack and lift a section past your lips, you’ll be transferring saturation-point layers fully laden with maximum syrupy succulence.

I tried this out, using fried shredded wheat (Yes, Fried Shredded Wheat.) as my test medium. Works perfectly.

;^)

Uncle Genie’s BaconEgg Battercakes

Pancakes luxurious with egg flavor and bacon-y crunch.

Ingredients (For one hearty serving)

~ Two large Grade A eggs. (It might be possible to use pasteurized eggs—no guarantees.)

~ Two strips of bacon. (Ditto on using alternatives.)

~ Self-rising flour (Self-rising, not all purpose. Read the front of the bag*.)

~ Maple syrup or topping of choice (warmed)

Preparation

~ In a skillet or sauté pan, fry the bacon crisp. Reserve some of the drippings for cooking the cakes.

~ While the bacon is cooking: Beat the eggs well in a mixing bowl. Add salt to taste and a pinch of sugar for each egg.

~ Beat in small amounts of the self-rising flour until you have a smooth, viscous mix, not as thin as 30-weight oil, but not as thick as joint compound. You’ll want it to flow gently when you pour it in the pan, not be runny. If you over-thicken it, add quick dribbles of water just until you recover a decent fluid movement. But remember, the water is diluting the flavor. Adding another beaten egg would be the preferred recovery plan.

~ Add a teaspoon of drippings or vegetable oil or melted butter to the batter and blend in.

~ Using a weapon or tool of choice, reduce the crisp-cooked bacon to pea-sized chunks. Mix the bacon chunks into the egg batter.

~ Pour the batter into the medium-hot, bacon-greased pan, making one large or two smaller cakes. Cook over medium heat until bubbles rise through the batter and the edges begin to look lightly browned. Turn once, cook for about half the time as the first side. (If side 1 is undercooked, fry side 2 a little longer. Serve the prettier side up.)

Serve.


*If all you have is all-purpose flour, add about a quarter teaspoon baking powder--no guarantees, I'm just eye-balling it here. If you don't have baking powder, either, then go to IHOP for breakfast.

;^)